Giving time and space to your child — Create a culture in the family where emotions are talked about. Make time daily to be with your child without distractions, to enjoy time together and have conversations. This opportunity sometimes leads to a child sharing concerns.
Modelling calmness — Parents may be struggling with their own worries. Be aware of how you model your own anxiety.
Listening and validating — Listen to your child. Hear what their concerns are, acknowledge their feelings, and let them know that you understand it's tough for them.
Limit reassurance — Asking questions is helpful, but giving excessive reassurance is not. It's very tempting to offer lots of reassurance, as it may relieve anxiety in the short term. In the long term it keeps it going. Instead, listen and ask them what they think, and what they think will help.
Deferring worries — Children can be encouraged to make a list of worries and have an agreed time to address them. For example, at 4pm spend 30 minutes discussing the worries on the list. This can help to contain anxiety, and often the worry feels less distressing at the deferred time.
Encourage a growth mindset — Help children to recognise that building a tolerance of uncertainty can help them manage their anxiety and develop their growth mindset — like building up 'mind muscles'. Encourage them to ask questions and support problem-solving skills so they can consider their own solutions.
Rewards — Use age-appropriate rewards to help children manage their anxiety about getting to school and coping once they're there.
Taking care of self and others — Encourage children to think about their own mental health: eating healthily, exercising, doing things they enjoy, and spending time with others. Practise being kind to themselves and to others.
