--- title: '2. The importance of expectations' url: 'https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/the-importance-of-everyone-knowing-whats-expected-of-them' markdown: 'https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/the-importance-of-everyone-knowing-whats-expected-of-them.md' date: '2026-07-16' description: 'Clear house rules are an essential starting point for managing children’s challenging behaviour. These rules are important during the current times when families are under pressure because they set out clear boundaries about what you want to encourage and discourage your child to do. They also promote respect between family members. Children like clear rules as long as they are fair, and they are applied with justice To set up these rules first arrange a meeting between all the adults in house – decide what your priorities are so you can focus on what is important. . You don’t want too many rules or they might be too complicated or hard to remember. Decide what will happen if rules are broken – will there be specific sanctions? Some rules will be relevant for everyone in the house and some for the children only. Once the adults have decided on the rules it’s vital to get the children on board as well. You need to take the time to explain the reasons. Get everyone to make a commitment to follow the rules – including people from outside the family– like grandparents. Put the rules on a poster so they are displayed for everyone to see – perhaps stick it on the fridge. Be consistent – make sure all the adults in the house apply the same rules in the same way – don’t let the children play one parent off against another and don’t have favourites. Regularly review the rules as a family – how are you all doing? Are the rules still relevant? Do they need to change?' taxonomy: category: - Toolkit tag: - 'Home Life' type: - Video partner: - KCL-IOPPN --- # Tip two: Making sure everyone knows what’s expected of them [ Home Life ](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/results/tag:Home%20Life) [ ![King’s College London’s Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/user/pages/06.about-us/03.partners/kings-college-londons-institute-of-psychiatry-psychology-and-neuroscience/kcl-ioppn.jpg) ](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/about-us/partners/kings-college-londons-institute-of-psychiatry-psychology-and-neuroscience "Content by King’s College London’s Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience") Duration: 0h 0m 44s Published: May 2020 Clear house rules are an essential starting point for managing children’s challenging behaviour. These rules are important during the current times when families are under pressure because they set out clear boundaries about what you want to encourage and discourage your child to do. - They also promote respect between family members. - Children like clear rules as long as they are fair, and they are applied with justice - To set up these rules first arrange a meeting between all the adults in house – decide what your priorities are so you can focus on what is important. . You don’t want too many rules or they might be too complicated or hard to remember. - Decide what will happen if rules are broken – will there be specific sanctions? - Some rules will be relevant for everyone in the house and some for the children only. - Once the adults have decided on the rules it’s vital to get the children on board as well. You need to take the time to explain the reasons. - Get everyone to make a commitment to follow the rules – including people from outside the family– like grandparents. - Put the rules on a poster so they are displayed for everyone to see – perhaps stick it on the fridge. - Be consistent – make sure all the adults in the house apply the same rules in the same way – don’t let the children play one parent off against another and don’t have favourites. - Regularly review the rules as a family – how are you all doing? Are the rules still relevant? Do they need to change? --- Was this helpful? 0 0 Share: [ Previous Post](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/how-to-keep-positive-and-motivated) [Next Post ](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/using-sanctions) #### Other Related Posts: ![](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/user/pages/03.toolkit/03.home-life/tips-for-parents/what-to-do-when-your-child-has-ptsd-tips-for-parents/children-and-ptsd.jpg) ### Video: What to do when your child has PTSD: Tips for Parents [Video: What to do when your child has PTSD: Tips for Parents](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/tips-for-parents/what-to-do-when-your-child-has-ptsd-tips-for-parents) A traumatic event can be difficult for a child to understand and process, and it can be challenging for parents and carers trying to support them. 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