---
title: '7. Keep Calm'
url: 'https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/keep-calm'
markdown: 'https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure/keep-calm.md'
date: '2026-02-27'
description: 'Tip 7: Keeping calm when your kids act up Parenting can be an emotional business –because we love our children, they can make us so upset that we lose our temper and do or say things that we regret. Parenting is most effective in reducing conflict and promoting good behaviour when it combines a calm authority with kindness and respect. Losing your temper as a parent never helps a situation – it may lead to more conflict and make it harder to establish control. Children may become frightened or upset or react angrily. They may also lose confidence in, and respect for, their parents and become more difficult to deal with. There are some ways to reduce the chances that you will over-react: avoid situations where you will find it hard to keep calm. Use a firm, steady, confident and respectful tone of voice. if you feel yourself getting upset – take a breath and collect your thoughts. Count to 10 or think of something pleasant. If you really get upset, walk away to a safe space at home where you can calm down. If you are having a problem with your temper it might be worth talking to your GP– it’s nothing to be ashamed of and they may be able to suggest something to help.'
taxonomy:
  category:
    - Toolkit
  tag:
    - 'Home Life'
  type:
    - Video
  partner:
    - KCL-IOPPN
---

# Tip 7: Keeping calm when your kids act up

 [ Home Life ](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/results/tag:Home%20Life) 

 [ ![King’s College London’s Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/user/pages/06.about-us/03.partners/kings-college-londons-institute-of-psychiatry-psychology-and-neuroscience/kcl-ioppn.jpg) ](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/about-us/partners/kings-college-londons-institute-of-psychiatry-psychology-and-neuroscience "Content by King’s College London’s Institute of Psychiatry, Psychology & Neuroscience") 

  Duration: 0h 0m 41s  Published: May 2020

## Tip 7: Keeping calm when your kids act up

Parenting can be an emotional business –because we love our children, they can make us so upset that we lose our temper and do or say things that we regret.

Parenting is most effective in reducing conflict and promoting good behaviour when it combines a calm authority with kindness and respect.

Losing your temper as a parent never helps a situation – it may lead to more conflict and make it harder to establish control.

Children may become frightened or upset or react angrily. They may also lose confidence in, and respect for, their parents and become more difficult to deal with.

There are some ways to reduce the chances that you will over-react:

- avoid situations where you will find it hard to keep calm.
- Use a firm, steady, confident and respectful tone of voice.
- if you feel yourself getting upset – take a breath and collect your thoughts. Count to 10 or think of something pleasant.
- If you really get upset, walk away to a safe space at home where you can calm down.

If you are having a problem with your temper it might be worth talking to your GP– it’s nothing to be ashamed of and they may be able to suggest something to help.

---

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---

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- Parent: [Families under Pressure](https://nipinthebud.trilbyhost.com/toolkit/home-life/families-under-pressure.md)
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